Monday, October 24, 2011

Brain Clutter

Well, I’m back again.  Hopefully not going to get the blue screen of death tonight.  =( 

I’m in a strange mood…I probably shouldn’t blog in this mood, but here I am anyway.  I don’t even know how to describe my mood, I’ve just got a lot of stuff on my mind and don’t really know how to talk about it. 

It’s like trying to clean out your house in front of an audience.  You pick up one thing and…oops…that’s kind of private…can’t touch that in front a crowd, let’s try this pile of clutter…nope don’t want to go there.  Okay, how bout just cleaning behind the couch…gag…is that a hairball?  Can the audience please forget they saw that?  How embarrassing!

Yeah, that’s kinda how I feel about doing a brain dump here.  The things that are cluttering up my mind these days are like my underwear drawer…all jumbled up, but necessary, and not something you’d want to sort out in front of a lot of people. 

I mean, just look at my analogies tonight…do you really think a total thought dump would be wisdom?  Yeah, I thought you’d see it my way. 

Here…how bout some gorgeous scenery?  This is from Munchkin’s field trip to the zoo on Thursday.  I didn’t feel all that great on Thursday, but I managed.  I tried to back out on Tuesday when I realized I was going to be exhausted from being sick and not up for walking a gazillion steps from North America all the way to Africa (after driving 2 hours), but the teacher laid the ol’ guilt trip on me and I’m a sucker like that.  I made it, but boy was I tired.  I went to bed at 10 that night and slept til 1 the NEXT day!  Well, I did get up to take the kids to school at 7, but then I came back and went right back to sleep.  I NEVER sleep that much.  Well anyway, back to that scenery:


I’m not quite sure, but I think that yellow stuff in the foreground of that gorgeous scenery, might possibly be ragweed. 

IMG_0161eWhich might explain why my eyes felt heavy and Munchkin kept saying hers were burning when we were sitting there six inches away from it. 

My eyes are heavy now.  That’s some powerful ragweed.  Or maybe I’m just tired.  I cleaned all 3.5 bathrooms today…that will do it…lol.  And ew…speaking of things you wouldn’t want to clean in front of an audience…haha. 

And now I’m back to thinking about the clutter in my brain that I don’t want to deal with right now.  Which makes me want to just throw up my hands and go to bed…except then, I’ll probably have weird dreams again…which could add to the clutter I don’t want to deal with in my brain.  Aaack…it’s a vicious cycle. 

Speaking of vicious cycles, I was rather annoyed at one of my kids who was expressing their frustrations in a very whiney way, and I was making them aware of how annoying that was and how that never works, and how it makes me sad that they are not thankful even though life’s not always fair…and then God turned it around on me.  And He said, if tomorrow things turn sour on you, wouldn’t you have a hard time being thankful, too?  Oh God, forgive me when I whine…or when I get aggravated at my kids for whining…I have too many things to be thankful for to be whining over any of it…even if I’m only whining on the inside.  I think my tone probably changed in my conversation with the kiddo…I suddenly became a little more understanding.  LOL.  God help me

And now, I really AM going to bed.  Weird dreams or not.  =)


  1. I was participating in some group emails today when one person pointed out that if we're real all the time, even if we're sharing honestly, that the majority of people couldn't handle it and we would do more harm than good by simply trying to be real and authentic. Kinda poses the question of how do we selectively choose the right audience and topics for authentic conversation? How do we cultivate relationships that are meaningful? Just some thoughts that felt like they tied into your post.

    I looked over to your bookshelf beside this post and the top book was "Big Girls Don't Whine" so I laughed a little to myself. :)

  2. Excellent thoughts, Amy, that's exactly what I was getting at and great questions there.

    ...and oops...maybe I need to go re-read that book!

  3. Ya I kinda know how you feel. This whole change in our family makes me feel that way. Like I'm not really sure what I'm thinking or how to think it! :) Just keep Calm and Carry on!! :0) Good thoughts on whining ;) Something I need to work on too!! Love ya!

  4. Anonymous1:32 PM

    Faith, the flowers are Goldenrod. Unrelated to ragweed.


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